出来后，劳教所的阴影还跟着我，总是让我想起在里面所受的酷刑。我在看书学法的时候、睡觉的时候、做家务的时候……随时随地那阴影都会跑出来。
这使我的心非常疲累，无法静心看书学法，而且那些阴影使我心生害怕，害怕又被抓回去，再受酷刑…….
于是，我把父母家中的厨房擦的珵亮，一边擦一边用MP3听师父的讲法；我用手洗全家的衣服，一边洗一边听师父讲法；我一遍一遍朗读《转法轮》；被那阴影折磨的睡不着时，我就彻夜学法，困了在书桌上趴一下继续学……
有时候那阴影折磨的我精疲力竭、痛苦万分，我躺在被窝里悄悄流两滴眼泪……
但我从不告诉父母我在承受的，我在他们面前尽量展现欢颜。
不久，我在学法中摆脱了那些阴影。
（待续）
(英文对照)
The forced labor camps’ shadow haunted me after I got out, constantly reminding me of the tortures I had suffered inside. While I was reading Dafa books, sleeping, doing housework…the shadow could pop out at any minute.
That exhausted my heart, made me unable to read Dafa books with a peaceful mind, and generated fear in me, fearing that I might be locked up and tortured again…
Then I swabbed my parents’ kitchen until it shone, while swabbing I listened to the recordings of Master Li’s lectures through a MP3; I hand-washed the whole family’s laundry, while washing I listened to the recordings of Master Li’s lectures; I read out Zhuan Falun over and over again; when the shadow tortured me to sleeplessness, I read Dafa books through the night; when I felt drowsy, I rest my head on the desk for a second and then reassumed reading.
The shadow tortured me to such exhaustion and agony at times I quietly shed a few tears in bed…
But I never told my parents what I was going through. I did my best to look happy in their presence.
Shortly afterward I threw off the shadow through studying Dafa.
(http://www.dajiyuan.com)
